Georgia is Four Months Old

Georgia turned four months old last week. What a little ball of sweetness she has become! She is the smiley-est baby, and SO vocal. She is making all kinds of sounds, the most recent one being "mmmm," and she pokes out her lips in a pucker when she says it. She is obsessed with her hands, constantly touching and trying to grasp things, and of course always wants to bring everything to her mouth. She is slobbering like crazy, but we love those little slobbery "kisses." She is doing better with the bottle, but still not as well as she does off the "tap." She eats enough during the day at daycare to get by, but definitely doesn't drink as much as she does when she nurses.

She is sleeping through the night (10-6) most nights. She just got over RSV and an ear infection, so that was causing her to wake up some at night again, but hopefully that was just from being sick and she will get back into her normal routine now. She has just found her feet, and is trying her best to roll over from back to stomach. We have only heard her actually laugh once, and it was with her big brother in the bathtub. She loves watching Banks running around playing. She wants to watch everything, and still likes to be held and in the center of the action as much as possible. Combined with her constant vocalizations, I predict Miss Georgia is going to be the life of the party.

She had a perfect 4 month check-up with Dr.Maddox.

Weight: 12.9, 18%
Length:24.5, 43%
Head Circumference: 15.7, 26%

Dear kids, When I Fail...

Banks and Georgia, This is an article by a momma at wonderoak.com, and her words are perfect. I hope ya'll always know my love for you over everything else.

Dear kids,

Sometimes I wake up in the morning and I see that you’ve grown over night. Your face is more defined, your eyes look older. A part of me is excited and in awe; I know you have so much ahead of you. Another part is scared because time is racing and I can’t slow it down. I’m afraid that I haven’t always been awake and noticing, and that somehow I have slept through the magic of your growing. I wonder, have I enjoyed you enough? Have I given you what you needed? Is your heart still whole? Is your spirit unbroken?

I’m not always good at this. I’m not always as good as I want to be at being your mom. I want to be great; and sometimes I am, but sometimes I’m not.

Sometimes I get it, and sometimes I don’t.

Sometimes I do it right, and sometimes I completely miss it.

Everyday I make mistakes.

Sometimes I snap when I should be sensitive. Sometimes I lecture and give chores when what you needed was a hug. Sometimes I completely and utterly miss it. I know that I do. I mistake your pain for complaining or your sad heart for a bad attitude. I watch myself miss it, and later I grieve that I didn’t respond differently.

I miss it when I am tired, and you get my leftovers at the end of a long day. I wish that you didn’t, but sometimes you do.

I miss it when I am scared. I am scared of big things and little things. I really thought adults had it all figured out, but I am one now, and it turns out we don’t. Sometimes fear snatches my heart and I can’t seem to think of anything else. I forget to relax and to enjoy you. I forget to smile and to laugh. I’m working on that.

I miss it when I am lost. I’m struggling with my own demons and it has nothing to do with you. Sometimes it’s anxiety or it’s depression, but it’s never, ever your fault. I will keep striving for wholeness so that when you reach those obstacles I can help you do the same.

I know that it is easy to hang on to the negative things and forget all the positive, but I want to set the record straight. When I look at you I am SO. PROUD. When I look at you I see good. I see someone who is mighty. I wonder how I have been trusted with such a treasure. Your heart is pure and soft. You are gentle and kind, you are vivacious and fierce.

I am forever your biggest cheerleader and your greatest fan.

Please keep helping me to see you and to know you. Keep telling me when I hurt your feelings. Keep sharing with me your fears and your insecurities and we will figure it out together.

I’m okay with making mistakes, but I’m never okay with losing your heart. Your heart is what matters to me.

I hope that my weakness teaches you something. I hope that when you come upon your own brokenness, tiredness, fear, and confusion, that you will be okay with it. I pray that your imperfections won’t scare you as they have me. I pray that you won’t run from them, but that you’ll wrestle with them and you will keep showing up, saying sorry, and trying again.

We don’t always get it right and that’s okay.

We are all professional mistake makers, and you will make lots and lots of mistakes. You will make countless amounts of mistakes, just like I have, but not one could darken the light I see when I look at you. 

You are my treasure, you are my reason.

Even though life is racing by, sometimes we have a moment. Sometimes we can reach out, grab time, and hold it. The world stops, all is quiet, and we really see each other. In this moment when I glimpse the person you are and who you’re becoming, all I can think is…

Wow.

On this morning, where it seems you’ve grown overnight, I want to tell you that you are wonderful. You amaze me everyday – and as I watch you, you inspire me. You inspire me to pull out the greatness that’s inside me. In this family we will make mistakes, but we will keep doing it together and we will keep holding each other other tight.

It turns out I’m never, ever, going to be perfect, but I am always and forever yours, and I’m always and forever on your team. That I can promise you.

I love you.

Love,

Mama

Banks is Three

I don't even know how to describe Banks in words. He is such a special and unique little guy, and I can never predict what he is going to say or do in different situations. It's so much fun watching him grow and develop. His heart is so precious and kind, and he is consistent in that he doesn't like to disappoint those he loves. He does push his limits and act out at times, but he always comes around and wants to do the right thing. I've had to really read up and experiment with ways to discipline him because "typical" discipline always seems to backfire with Banks. Spanking him makes him more aggressive, and time out seems to make him feel isolated and causes him to withdraw and act out more. I've learned that getting down on his level, making eye contact, and having a consistent verbal discussion every time he acts out is much more effective for Banks. Although it's much more time consuming, it definitely helps him turn his behavior around and express himself in a constructive way. When that fails, a threat to take away TV for the evening usually does the trick.

Banks is now fully potty trained as of about October, and he got to move up classrooms at daycare at the beginning of December. His learning and development has taken off rapidly since he moved up. He knows the alphabet song, can count to 10, knows all his colors and shapes, and is beginning to learn to identify written letters and numbers. As worried as I was about his language development for awhile there, he has officially surpassed any expectations and he talks a million miles a minute, asking a thousand questions a day. He keeps us laughing constantly now with the things he comes up with. He LOVES anything music related, and was the star of the show at his Christmas program. He sang "Jingle Bells" for a month straight. He really enjoys singing and dancing. Some of his other favorite things include Elmo, Mickey Mouse, "cleaning,"tractors, fire trucks and "water hoses," watching TV (Daniel Tiger, Paw Patrol, Mickey, Handy Manny). He's recently gotten into superheroes (I'm guessing from hearing the other kids at school), and he tells me all the time that he has "big muscles." He loves to pretend, and we've gotten him several dress-up items, such as a fireman outfit and doctor kit.

We had Banks' 3rd birthday party at Hopewell Fire Department. He was so excited and talked about it for weeks. When he arrived at the party, the sweet firefighters turned on the lights and sirens of 3-4 of the trucks, and Banks was TERRIFIED. I'm talking shaking, don't put me down, terrified. It took him about an hour to warm back up and play with his friends. He specifically requested a cookie cake at his party, so I ordered him one from the Chocolate Shoppe in Greenville. He loved it. Casey cooked him some cupcakes and we took them into his class on his actual Birthday and let the kids sing to him and have cupcakes.

Christmas was so much fun with him this year. In addition to the Christmas program, we enjoyed watching him learn about all of the traditions - elf on the shelf, movies, songs, Santa and his reindeer, lights, trees, and most importantly, "baby Jesus in his cradle." He was so excited during the whole month and it brought so much joy to us to watch his excitement and innocence. He asked Santa for "TWO vacuums," and a "laser," which is actually a toy gun that lights up, but we call it a laser. Santa brought him one vacuum that really sucks up stuff, a balance bike with a helmet, the "laser," and a variety of play dough toys, books, coloring books, pajamas, etc. The first thing out of his mouth when he saw everything Santa brought was, "Where is the other vacuum?" We were able to defer the question by pointing out his new bike, but he did bring it up a couple more times throughout the day. Patrick and I had to laugh about that because it's so typical Banks... he doesn't forget a thing!

Banks is SUCH an amazing big brother. I had been so nervous about how he was going to adjust to having a new baby in the house, and how it was going to affect him. He has taken to Georgia better than we could have even asked for, and he loves her with all of his heart. He kisses her, tells me to feed her when she cries, covers her up with blankets if he thinks she is cold, and talks to her in his special "Georgia" voice. He has to kiss her every night before going to sleep, even if she's screaming. Watching him with her makes my heart literally explode. It's almost too much for me to even handle.

Our sweet boy loves to have a routine and to know what to expect. If we change anything up on him too much, it throws him for a complete loop. We have to stay very consistent with his bedtime, daily routine, meals, etc. He is still a pretty picky eater, mostly when it comes to trying anything new. I'm just hoping time will help with that as he gets a little older. He is still the best sleeper we could ask for, sleeping 11-13 hours every night and still taking 2-3 hour naps.

He had his 3 year check-up yesterday, and he did great. He had gotten his flu shot a couple of weeks ago, so he didn't have to get any shots (although the flu shot didn't bother him at all, he just told the nurse to, "get him a bandaid"). He was so funny talking to the nurses and Dr.Maddox. He asked the nurses a thousand questions about all of the equipment in the room where they check him in, weigh him, take his blood pressure, and measure him. He danced and played "boo" with everyone that walked by in the hallway while we were waiting on a room. He asked the nurses if they were "busy." He told Dr.Maddox that he is his "fwiend" and asked to play with his "flashlight" and stethoscope. Of course Dr.Maddox let him! It is always such a relief to have a good checkup with Banks. His health is something I will always worry about with everything we've gone through with him, and I pray about it every single day. We have his 6 month kidney check at the end of January.

Weight: 32 pounds, 51%
Height: 37.5, 47%

Banks continues to be my heart. Literally. Every single day he makes me so happy and proud, and I love him in a way that I can never love anyone else. At night, he tells me that he wants to "love me" and he wraps his arms around my neck and nuzzles his face in my hair. I rub his back every night and he always asks me to do it "again" and "again." I go to bed every night with a heart full of love and counting my blessings. I don't know what I did to deserve such a precious gift from God, but I am so thankful. I can't wait to see what year #3 brings!